Stop — I want to get off!

Remember when you could ask for “do-overs” and when you could demand that the merry-go-round be stopped so you could get off? Well, my family has had a challenging (to say the least) week and I DO NOT want a do-over, but I would like to step off this insane ride for a few moments to catch my breath.

We’ve had three deaths in our extended family since Jan. 2, my computer was eaten alive by a trojan virus and our furnace quit working on the same day the temperatures hit the teens and the windchill took the mercury below zero!

Now let’s back up the truck and I’ll give you more details.

My husband’s uncle died on Jan. 2 from injuries he received in a horrible car accident just after Christmas. He lived in Kentucky, so my husband and his parents made the eight-hour drive from St. Louis to Kentucky late Monday night, returning on Wednesday. It was particularly hard on my mother-in-law, who is close to all of her siblings.

My great uncle also died on Jan. 2 after being ill for some time. He lived in the St. Louis area, so I was able to attend his wake Tuesday night (Jan. 5), but only after arranging carpools for my older children and only with my toddler in tow. It was a challenge, but I’m glad I went for my Mom, who is very sad, and to see lots of family that I seldom see.

On the same day as the wake, my brother’s father-in-law died after a year-long battle with pancreatic cancer. I knew this man before I even knew his daughter, who became my sister-in-law, because he had been my boss at my first teenage job at the Florissant (MO) K-Mart. He was a kind man who my brother had come to love and who was loved dearly by his daughters. His wake and funeral this weekend will be very sad and it will be hard to watch his widow, my brother and sister-in-law and their boys grieve the loss.

Certainly less important, but significantly disruptive, has been the destruction of my computer by a trojan virus. (Remember, I’m a freelance writer/communications professional who MAKES A LIVING AT HOME WITH A FUNCTIONAL COMPUTER).  This happened Dec. 30 and my poor husband has spent countless hours attempting to salvage it (amid all this other craziness), but we finally gave up. It is my intention to save the money to buy a Macintosh — IAM DONE WITH PC’S. But, as a Band-aid (and after more than one three-hour conversation with Microsoft support professionals on the other side of the globe) we’ve purchased a new computer. Now, I’m waiting for my dear husband to get home from work and “make it so.” In other words, I want him to restore all the crap off the back-up external hard drive, and set up all the other systems and processes I need to work. I am tired of working on a slow laptop that doesn’t like me to answer work emails, open attachments, save anything to the hard drive, open more than two Internet windows, blog, update my site, etc.

I should have been back up and running YESTERDAY but the supplier from which we ordered my new computer failed to deliver it yesterday as was promised. We were told it was “backordered” and they could not tell us when it woudl arrive. Unacceptable. We canceled the order and began shopping elsewhere. While doing that, we noticed it suddenly felt very cold in our house. “No honey — that’s not ME being ICY because I’m mad about my computer not arriving. It really is cold in here.” Hhrummpf! Like I could be enough of a witch to lower the temperature of the house!

Anyway, that’s when we discovered that the furnace wasn’t working. Guess what? Heating and air conditioning dudes are really busy when it gets super cold outside and the weather guys are predicting six inches of snow! To spare you boring details — our furnace is “temporarily” fixed while we wait for a part to be ordered that is due next Tuesday. No guarantees it will keep heating the house until then. Just a “let’s hope so” from the furnace dude.

Surprisingly, I haven’t had a complete tantrum yet. I’ve had a few “almost tantrums,” but no complete tantrums. My Beth Moore Bible Study is helping — this week’s lesson was on waiting/patience, neither of which are my strong suits and both upon which I needed desperately to focus. I was reminded that God’s in control, not me. And THAT gives me some peace. So, I’ll stay on the merry-go-round of life and be grateful for it.

You Cannot Amputate Your History

Like most people, I have things in my past that I would gladly erase. But I try not to dwell on those things, and really believe there is value in the advice that says “Do not regret the past, nor try to shut the door on it.”

I got some help with my attitude in this area yesterday. I’m currently participating in the Beth Moore Bible Study at my church, “Esther: It’s Tough Being a Woman.” This is the second Beth Moore Study I’ve done, and while we’re only in week two, I can already tell it’s going to be a great one. I plan to share some of the great things I learn in the study here, and yesterday included these gems from Beth’s video lecture:

“You cannot amputate your history from your destiny. Never forget what God dragged you out of. Your past and your future share the same root.”

I was inspired by those words and I hope you are, too.